Again, I am bringing Fr. Ron Rolheiser to you. I so appreciate the gift of communication that God has given him.
When I read Fr. Ron I am reminded of something I once heard, "Jesus, through the Sacred Word, brings comfort to the afflicted and brings affliction to the comfortable." I get both, one way or another, in and through the writings of Fr. Ron. Enjoy -- be comforted and be challenged.
The Pearl of Great Price and its Cost
2008-07-27
A woman I know tells this story: She married a man she loved but, early on in the marriage, was too immature to responsibly carry her part of the relationship. One night she went to a party with her husband, drank too much, and left the party with another man. Eventually she sobered up and repentantly found her way home, fully expecting the marital skies to be ripped asunder with anger. But her husband though hurt and shaken by what had happened was calm, philosophical, direct. When she walked sheepishly into the room he demanded neither an explanation nor an apology. Ultimately, what is there to say? He simply said to her: "I'm going away for a few days so that you can be alone because you need to decide who you are: Are you a married woman or are you something else?" He took a three-day sabbatical from her, she cried, sorted out the question he had put to her, and now, years beyond this painful incident, she is inside a solid marriage and infinitely more aware that the pearl of great price comes precisely at a price.
Every choice is a renunciation. Thomas Aquinas said that and it helps explain why we struggle so painfully to make clear choices. We want the right things, but we want other things too.Every choice is a series of renunciations: If I marry one person, I cannot marry anyone else; if I live in one place, I cannot live anywhere else; if I choose a certain career, that excludes many other careers; if I have this, then I cannot have that. The list could go on indefinitely. To choose one thing is to renounce others. That's the nature of choice.
In most areas of our lives we do not feel this so painfully. We choose and there isn't a lot of sting to the loss. But the area of love is more sensitive. Here we feel the sting of loss more strongly and here we often find it hard to accept the real limits of life. What are those limits? They are the limits that come with being an infinite spirit in a finite world.We are fired into this world with a madness that comes from the gods and has us believe that we are destined to embrace the cosmos itself. We don't want something, we want everything. That's a simple way, though a good one, of saying something that Christianity has always said, namely, that in body and soul we are meant to embrace everyone and we already hunger for that. Perhaps we experience it most clearly in our sexuality, but the hunger is everywhere present in us. Our yearning is wide, our longing is infinite, our urge to embrace is promiscuous. We are infinite in yearning, but, in this life, only get to meet the finite. That's what makes love difficult. We are over-charged for our own lives. We have divine fire inside us, want everything, yearn for the whole world, and yet, at a point, have to commit to one particular person, at one particular place, and in one very particular life, with all the limits that imposes. Infinite desire limited by a finite choice, such is the nature of real life and love. Life and love, beyond the abstract and beyond the grandiosity of our own daydreams, involve hard, painful renunciation. But it is precisely that very renunciation that helps us grow up and makes our lives real in a way that our daydreams don't.
In trying to explain some of the deeper secrets of life, Jesus gives us this parable: The Kingdom of God is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, when he finds a single one of great value, he goes and sells all that he owns and buys that pearl. That, the pearl of great price, the value of love and its cost, is in essence the challenge that young husband put to his wife when he told her to sort out the question: "Are you a married woman or are you something else?" For what are you willing to renounce other things?What is our own pearl of great price? Are we willing to give up everything in exchange for it? Are we willing to live with its limits? Until we are clear on these questions there is forever the danger that, like the wife who left the party without her husband, we will act out in dangerous and hurtful ways.Thoreau once said: "The youth gets together materials to build a bridge to the moon or perhaps a palace or a temple ... at length the middle-aged man concludes to build a woodshed with them." So too in love and life: The child sets out make love to the whole world and the adult eventually concludes to marry a single person, in essence, to build a woodshed. But it's only in that woodshed where life and love are real in this world.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Suicide
There is a Roman Catholic priest, Fr. Ron Rohlheiser, seminary president in Texas, who is extremely profound in his writings. Everything he writes, I read.
I have found Fr. Ron to be extremely helpful when it comes to the issue of suicide. Generally, I think there is a lot of ignorance about suicide. Because I cannot say it as well as Fr. Ron...here are his thoughts....I would appreciate knowing your thoughts in response.
Our Misconceptions about Suicide
2008-07-20
Sometimes things need to be said, and said, and said, until they don't need to be said any more. Margaret Atwood wrote that and its truth is the reason why, each year, I write a column on suicide. We still have too many misconceptions about suicide.I won’t try to be original in this column, but will simply try to re-state, as clearly as possible, what needs to be said over and over again:What are our misconceptions about suicide?First, that suicide is an act of despair. Too common still is the belief that suicide is the ultimate act of despair - culpable and unforgivable. To commit suicide, it is too commonly believed, puts one under the judgement once pronounced on Judas Iscariot: Better to not have been born. Until recently, victims of suicide were often not even buried in church cemeteries. What is more true is that the propensity for suicide is, in most cases, an illness. We are made up of body and soul. Either can snap. We can die of cancer, high blood pressure, heart attacks, aneurysms. These are physical sicknesses. But we can suffer these as well in the soul. There are malignancies and aneurysms too of the heart, deadly wounds from which the soul cannot recover. In most cases, suicide, like any terminal illness, takes a person out of life against his or her will. The death is not freely chosen, but is an illness, far from an act of free will. In most instances, suicide is a desperate attempt to end unendurable pain, much like a man who throws himself through a window because his clothing is on fire. That's a tragedy, not an act of despair. Given the truth of this, we need to give up the notion that suicide puts a person outside the mercy of God. God's mercy is equal even to suicide. After the resurrection, we see how Christ, more than once, goes through locked doors and breathes forgiveness, love, and peace into hearts that are unable to open themselves because of fear and hurt. God's mercy and peace can go through walls that we can't. And, as we know, this side of heaven, sometimes all the love, stretched-out hands, and professional help in the world can no longer reach through to a heart paralysed by fear and illness. But when we are helpless, God is not. God’s love can descend into hell itself (as we profess in our creed) and breathe peace and reconciliation inside wound, anger, and fear. God's hands are gentler than ours, God's compassion is wider than ours, and God's understanding infinitely surpasses our own. Our wounded loved ones who fall victim to suicide are safe in God's hands, safer by far than they are in the judgements that issue from our own limited understanding. God is not stymied by locked doors like we are. In most cases, suicide is an illness and when its victims wake on the other side, they are met by a gentle Christ who stands right inside of their huddled fear and says: "Peace be with you!" As we see in the gospels, God can go through locked doors, breathe out peace in places where we cannot get in, and write straight with even the most crooked of lines. Finally too there is a misunderstanding about suicide that expresses itself in second-guessing: If only I had done more! If only I had been more attentive this could have been prevented. Rarely is this the case. Most of the time, we weren't there when our loved one died for the very reason that this person didn't want us to be there. He or she picked the time and place precisely with our absence in mind. Suicide is a disease that picks its victim precisely in such a way so as to exclude others and their attentiveness. That's part of the anatomy of the disease. This, of course, may never be an excuse for insensitivity to those around us who are suffering from depression, but it's a healthy check against false guilt and anxious second-guessing. Many of us have stood at the bedside of someone who is dying and experienced a frustrating helplessness because there was nothing we could do to prevent our loved one from dying. That person died, despite our attentiveness, prayers, and efforts to be helpful. So too, at least generally, with those who die of suicide. Our love, attentiveness, and presence could not stop them from dying, despite our will and effort to the contrary. The Christian response to suicide should not be horror, fear for the person's eternal salvation, and anxious self-examination about we did or didn't do. Suicide is indeed a terrible way to die, but we must understand it for what it is, a sickness, and stop being anxious about both the person's eternal salvation and our less-than-perfect response to his or her illness. God redeems everything and, in the end, all manner of being will be well, beyond even suicide.
I have found Fr. Ron to be extremely helpful when it comes to the issue of suicide. Generally, I think there is a lot of ignorance about suicide. Because I cannot say it as well as Fr. Ron...here are his thoughts....I would appreciate knowing your thoughts in response.
Our Misconceptions about Suicide
2008-07-20
Sometimes things need to be said, and said, and said, until they don't need to be said any more. Margaret Atwood wrote that and its truth is the reason why, each year, I write a column on suicide. We still have too many misconceptions about suicide.I won’t try to be original in this column, but will simply try to re-state, as clearly as possible, what needs to be said over and over again:What are our misconceptions about suicide?First, that suicide is an act of despair. Too common still is the belief that suicide is the ultimate act of despair - culpable and unforgivable. To commit suicide, it is too commonly believed, puts one under the judgement once pronounced on Judas Iscariot: Better to not have been born. Until recently, victims of suicide were often not even buried in church cemeteries. What is more true is that the propensity for suicide is, in most cases, an illness. We are made up of body and soul. Either can snap. We can die of cancer, high blood pressure, heart attacks, aneurysms. These are physical sicknesses. But we can suffer these as well in the soul. There are malignancies and aneurysms too of the heart, deadly wounds from which the soul cannot recover. In most cases, suicide, like any terminal illness, takes a person out of life against his or her will. The death is not freely chosen, but is an illness, far from an act of free will. In most instances, suicide is a desperate attempt to end unendurable pain, much like a man who throws himself through a window because his clothing is on fire. That's a tragedy, not an act of despair. Given the truth of this, we need to give up the notion that suicide puts a person outside the mercy of God. God's mercy is equal even to suicide. After the resurrection, we see how Christ, more than once, goes through locked doors and breathes forgiveness, love, and peace into hearts that are unable to open themselves because of fear and hurt. God's mercy and peace can go through walls that we can't. And, as we know, this side of heaven, sometimes all the love, stretched-out hands, and professional help in the world can no longer reach through to a heart paralysed by fear and illness. But when we are helpless, God is not. God’s love can descend into hell itself (as we profess in our creed) and breathe peace and reconciliation inside wound, anger, and fear. God's hands are gentler than ours, God's compassion is wider than ours, and God's understanding infinitely surpasses our own. Our wounded loved ones who fall victim to suicide are safe in God's hands, safer by far than they are in the judgements that issue from our own limited understanding. God is not stymied by locked doors like we are. In most cases, suicide is an illness and when its victims wake on the other side, they are met by a gentle Christ who stands right inside of their huddled fear and says: "Peace be with you!" As we see in the gospels, God can go through locked doors, breathe out peace in places where we cannot get in, and write straight with even the most crooked of lines. Finally too there is a misunderstanding about suicide that expresses itself in second-guessing: If only I had done more! If only I had been more attentive this could have been prevented. Rarely is this the case. Most of the time, we weren't there when our loved one died for the very reason that this person didn't want us to be there. He or she picked the time and place precisely with our absence in mind. Suicide is a disease that picks its victim precisely in such a way so as to exclude others and their attentiveness. That's part of the anatomy of the disease. This, of course, may never be an excuse for insensitivity to those around us who are suffering from depression, but it's a healthy check against false guilt and anxious second-guessing. Many of us have stood at the bedside of someone who is dying and experienced a frustrating helplessness because there was nothing we could do to prevent our loved one from dying. That person died, despite our attentiveness, prayers, and efforts to be helpful. So too, at least generally, with those who die of suicide. Our love, attentiveness, and presence could not stop them from dying, despite our will and effort to the contrary. The Christian response to suicide should not be horror, fear for the person's eternal salvation, and anxious self-examination about we did or didn't do. Suicide is indeed a terrible way to die, but we must understand it for what it is, a sickness, and stop being anxious about both the person's eternal salvation and our less-than-perfect response to his or her illness. God redeems everything and, in the end, all manner of being will be well, beyond even suicide.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Supporting one of our own
I have been told that a blog is personal and that I am not, in any way, speaking in behalf of the congregation or the United Methodist Church. Therefore, I am sharing a personal opinion and conviction with you.
One of our own, Mr. Jeff Van Zandt, is running for District Judge in Sedgwick County. Anyone is Sedgwick County is eligible for vote for a judge in District 28. My goal is not to tell persons how to vote. I am simply wanting you to know that one of our own is running your political office and brings a wealth of credentials and credibility to the task.
Adrienne, Jeff's wife, wrote a great letter that I will gladly add my signature to.
Dear Friends:
In the past few years we have seen many instances of judicial rulings that have impacted our society. Many of these decisions have been contrary to our enacted law and statutes but are still made due to judges who feel the need or desire to enact law from the bench not taking into account the actual wishes of the electorate. Nationwide, rulings are handed down almost daily, which the average citizen finds totally shocking and unbelievable. These decisions are impacting the lives of our children, spouses, friends and fellow citizens. We are now seeing many judicial rulings being handed down from the courts, which are adversely affecting our economy and our way of life. That is why I am writing this letter to you today.
There is an attorney in our church family who has entered his name in the Sedgwick County Judicial race. His name is Jeff VanZandt and he is running for District Judge in District 28.
Jeff's legal background and experience are quite impressive. He has been practicing law for over 23 years. His years of practice have given him a comprehensive and diverse background in business, real estate, banking, consumer and family law. He also has a vast experience and record in civil and commercial litigation. His professional accomplishments are many and as stated earlier, very impressive.
This; however, is not why I have taken the time to contact you and write this letter. I am supporting Jeff and urging your support for Mr. VanZandt for his character and ethics. I can promise you that if you choose to support and elect Jeff for your District Judge, you will see only strict enforcement and application of the law as it stands.
Jeff is a family man and devoted Christian who is committed to serving his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, his wife and two teenage sons, Chapel Hill, and his community. Additionally, Jeff has a genuine concern for our state and nation and the future it will provide to succeeding generations. Fellow citizens, our country and state laws have served our nation well, with fairness, equality and impartiality. We do not need activist judges with hidden agendas sitting in our courts. We certainly do not need one in this district. We need someone with Jeff’s courage and convictions to rule fairly, impartially and not try to make decisions to change our societal principles.
I can only tell you that due to my concern for and the sake of my children, my wife, my friends and my community, I will do everything I can to help elect Jeff for District Judge this year and will be voting for him in the August 5th primary. I urge you to not waste this precious vote because this year, for this office, you have a choice that truly will make a difference for your futures.
Vote VanZandt for District Judge on August 5th. Jeff possesses Honesty, Integrity and Common Sense.
Thank you for your kind consideration!
For additional information or contributions, please contact:
Vote VanZandt, PO Box 781140, Wichita, KS 67207,
Paul Dahlke, Treasurer
One of our own, Mr. Jeff Van Zandt, is running for District Judge in Sedgwick County. Anyone is Sedgwick County is eligible for vote for a judge in District 28. My goal is not to tell persons how to vote. I am simply wanting you to know that one of our own is running your political office and brings a wealth of credentials and credibility to the task.
Adrienne, Jeff's wife, wrote a great letter that I will gladly add my signature to.
Dear Friends:
In the past few years we have seen many instances of judicial rulings that have impacted our society. Many of these decisions have been contrary to our enacted law and statutes but are still made due to judges who feel the need or desire to enact law from the bench not taking into account the actual wishes of the electorate. Nationwide, rulings are handed down almost daily, which the average citizen finds totally shocking and unbelievable. These decisions are impacting the lives of our children, spouses, friends and fellow citizens. We are now seeing many judicial rulings being handed down from the courts, which are adversely affecting our economy and our way of life. That is why I am writing this letter to you today.
There is an attorney in our church family who has entered his name in the Sedgwick County Judicial race. His name is Jeff VanZandt and he is running for District Judge in District 28.
Jeff's legal background and experience are quite impressive. He has been practicing law for over 23 years. His years of practice have given him a comprehensive and diverse background in business, real estate, banking, consumer and family law. He also has a vast experience and record in civil and commercial litigation. His professional accomplishments are many and as stated earlier, very impressive.
This; however, is not why I have taken the time to contact you and write this letter. I am supporting Jeff and urging your support for Mr. VanZandt for his character and ethics. I can promise you that if you choose to support and elect Jeff for your District Judge, you will see only strict enforcement and application of the law as it stands.
Jeff is a family man and devoted Christian who is committed to serving his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, his wife and two teenage sons, Chapel Hill, and his community. Additionally, Jeff has a genuine concern for our state and nation and the future it will provide to succeeding generations. Fellow citizens, our country and state laws have served our nation well, with fairness, equality and impartiality. We do not need activist judges with hidden agendas sitting in our courts. We certainly do not need one in this district. We need someone with Jeff’s courage and convictions to rule fairly, impartially and not try to make decisions to change our societal principles.
I can only tell you that due to my concern for and the sake of my children, my wife, my friends and my community, I will do everything I can to help elect Jeff for District Judge this year and will be voting for him in the August 5th primary. I urge you to not waste this precious vote because this year, for this office, you have a choice that truly will make a difference for your futures.
Vote VanZandt for District Judge on August 5th. Jeff possesses Honesty, Integrity and Common Sense.
Thank you for your kind consideration!
For additional information or contributions, please contact:
Vote VanZandt, PO Box 781140, Wichita, KS 67207,
Paul Dahlke, Treasurer
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
True Patriotism
As we approach the 4th of July, celebrating our Independence and all that it stands for, many have asked me what I thought about church sponsored patriotic programs.
I was reminded that Meredith and I spent a week at two Mennonite Churches in Beatrice, Nebraska. I was teaching in the mornings and evenings and then I preached at both churches on Sunday morning. It was a great time in a lot of ways.
A week before going to Beatrice, my hostess called me and said, "you need to know that last week the church board voted to remove the flags from the sanctuary. It was a tied vote and my husband, as chair, had to break the tie. He voted to remove the flags from the sanctuary."
Needless to say...I was glad that I was prepared for the potential conflict that I would encounter and was pondering my own views about faith and flag. I was asking myself questions like, "what about having flags in the sanctuary....is that appropriate? Is it appropriate to celebrate the 4th of July in the church? Etcetera and etcetera.
So....what do you think?
After I hear from you....I will share some more thoughts.
Jeff
I was reminded that Meredith and I spent a week at two Mennonite Churches in Beatrice, Nebraska. I was teaching in the mornings and evenings and then I preached at both churches on Sunday morning. It was a great time in a lot of ways.
A week before going to Beatrice, my hostess called me and said, "you need to know that last week the church board voted to remove the flags from the sanctuary. It was a tied vote and my husband, as chair, had to break the tie. He voted to remove the flags from the sanctuary."
Needless to say...I was glad that I was prepared for the potential conflict that I would encounter and was pondering my own views about faith and flag. I was asking myself questions like, "what about having flags in the sanctuary....is that appropriate? Is it appropriate to celebrate the 4th of July in the church? Etcetera and etcetera.
So....what do you think?
After I hear from you....I will share some more thoughts.
Jeff
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